Madame Agatha
What do you want?
Madame Agatha
Preparing for the ritual
Steve
Sorry to interrupt, but I've got some Q's
Madame Agatha
Have you gathered the items?
Steve
That's what the Q's are about
Madame Agatha
Is the list not clear?
Madame Agatha
If I'm to cast this spell for you, the ritual must be complete
Steve
And really, thank you so much for helping me out
Madame Agatha
You try my patience.
Steve
I haven't read cursive in a long time
Steve
And this paper is weird
Madame Agatha
It is the skin of a heretic
Steve
Oh. That would explain it
Madame Agatha
You don't know what that is, do you?
Steve
I can look it up? The wifi isn't great here
Madame Agatha
What are your questions? The ritual draws nigh
Steve
So I'm gathering the items
Madame Agatha
Where are you?
Madame Agatha
The grocery store? These are serious magicks!
Steve
They've got everything!
Madame Agatha
What do you need?
Steve
So where it says red wine, will grape juice work?
Madame Agatha
Are you serious
Steve
Not Juicy Juice, like sparkling grape
Steve
It's the same kind of bottle
Madame Agatha
Is the list unclear?
Steve
I'd just rather not make a second stop
Madame Agatha
You came to me for help
Madame Agatha
You begged me for this spell. You pleaded.
Madame Agatha
You said you would do anything for her.
Madame Agatha
'Anything' doesn't include a second stop, apparently
Steve
So...no grape juice?
Steve
Ok, ok. I just thought it might be a symbolic thing
Madame Agatha
This is black magick, not a presbyterian Sunday school
Steve
You're probably going to want a whole chicken, huh?
Steve
There's a really great sale on cutlets, is all
Madame Agatha
Do you want this to work or not?
Madame Agatha
Then put the cutlets down
Steve
I'm still going to buy them
Madame Agatha
Do not tarry. The ritual must be done on the night of a blue moon
Madame Agatha
That is proverbially and in reality, fairly uncommon
Madame Agatha
Have you lost your will?
Steve
No! It's just...it's not creepy, right?
Madame Agatha
Not creepy?
Madame Agatha
Asking a Witch to cast a love spell that involves a live chicken is creepy
Steve
I mean like, consent-wise. Julie's gonna be in love with me because she wants to be, right?
Madame Agatha
If that were true would you need my help?
Steve
I thought maybe it would just like, amplify things, not brainwash her
Madame Agatha
Does she have feelings for you?
Steve
She would. If I talked to her.
Madame Agatha
Dammit, Steve
Steve
We like the same movies according to facebook
Madame Agatha
What were you expecting this to amplify?
Madame Agatha
Her love for Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind?
Steve
How did you know that's her favorite?
Madame Agatha
1) I have supernatural powers
Madame Agatha
2) I have facebook
Steve
I don't want to take advantage of her, you know?
Madame Agatha
You did ask me for a love spell, right?
Steve
Yeah, but not a roofie spell
Steve
I want her to want to want me.
Madame Agatha
There is much to be done.
Steve
I'm lonely, sure, but I'm not a monster.
Madame Agatha
Forget the chicken.
Madame Agatha
I'm gonna level with you, Steve
Madame Agatha
This isn't going to go well
Steve
I said I can get the wine
Madame Agatha
Doesn't matter
Madame Agatha
This was one of your classic "careful what you wish for" deals
Madame Agatha
Basically, we do the ritual and it works but too well
Madame Agatha
Or it backfires and she falls for someone else
Madame Agatha
Or it doesn't work and you just think it does
Madame Agatha
And you end up either in jail or insane or both while I cackle with glee
Madame Agatha
I'm not big on nice
Madame Agatha
The hat should have been a clue
Steve
Why are you telling me this?
Madame Agatha
You're not terrible, just misguided
Madame Agatha
Forget the whole thing, Steve
Madame Agatha
Go home and rest and maybe try talking to Julie
Madame Agatha
You might be surprised
Madame Agatha
Now trouble me no more, mortal
Steve
Just one more thing...
Steve
What are you up to tonight?
Steve
And don't say the ritual because I know that was canceled
Madame Agatha
I have no plans...
Steve
You want to have dinner?
Madame Agatha
Chicken cutlets?
Steve
And I hear there's a blue moon tonight.
Steve
Great! See u soon :)
Madame Agatha
Don't forget the wine.
